Reflection

The point of this blog is about life. Random parts of teenage life that most people assume and care not to know about. About how life sucks sometimes, and how life is pretty darn good most times. How no matter what, life goes on. But today, it doesn't. Since December the 20th, life hasn't gone on. Not for one family, at least. After nineteen years of bringing up your son, the light of your life, it doesn't feel right that you should have to go through what Mr. and Mrs. Conrad are going through. On December 20th, 2009, their nineteen year old son Cody Alan passed away. It was at that moment that life stopped. He was an extremely special person, and when he passed, the world lost yet another piece of sunshine. He went in for surgery on the twentieth, because a donor match had been made. He was finally getting new lungs to help start him on a new life that was no longer filled with a long list of limitations. I believe you know the ending to this story, though. He did not make it through the operation, and ended up passing away.

We take each day in stride, stuck in our own routines, not even paying attention to our actions or surroundings. Our days blur together in a big mass of the same activities and unfulfilled promises. We don't realize that when we think "I'll do it later," later may not be possible. It upsets me to see people wasting their lives away. Especially people who have so much potential in life, and they just throw it away. It makes a difference when you're dying, when you realize that the up and down movement of your chest as you breathe will cease, the steady thump thump that pounds in your ears will quiet, the visions you see, the tastes you taste, the scents you smell, the things you touch, will all be a thing of the past. Do I believe it is the end? No, simply the phase that leads us from one beginning to another. But when a person passes from this phase, especially at nineteen when he had so much more left to experience, it hurts.
Yes, I believe death leads to heaven. I, being christian, trust God to take care of me and my soul. My funeral? I want party hats and confetti, and I want it all to be held in a stable full of horses. I want loud, happy music and the only tears will be those of joy, because I am in a better place and am a lot happier. And in my casket I want my magic fiddle, tulips and wild orange tiger lillies. Is all of that possible? More than likely not. But I'm a dreamer, and nobody ever said dreaming was a bad thing to do.
Please, for the sake of all that is sane in this world, enjoy life. I can almost guaruntee it will seem like everything that can go wrong does, and that the good stuff is so small it's hardly worth living for. We all have a little good in us, and a little bad, just like the world around us. But we have to learn how to conquer the bad and listen to the good, because the good is all that's worth living for anymore. The good is what we have to hold on to, and when that disappears, so do we. So hold on to the goodness, the happiness, the light, each other. Hold on to everything you can, but also learn to just let go of what is gone and move on. Life changes with each breath we take, so please, just keep breathing, and enjoy every second of it. A new moment in time is just another blessing that we take for granted, and it is at this time that I say, no more. Life isn't always funny or good, but with the right outlook, determination, and friends, anything is possible. Never lose hope, never lose faith. Never lose yourself.
Goodnight, world. (and all who inhabit it.) ♥